i have a crush on an older woman

So in this situation: Oh, you know, 2020 how was yours? Or: Well, Im glad 2020 is over! As in, OMG my sister read my diary, I cant believe it, as well as Let me put that in the diary for next Tuesday. It makes me feel both resentful that they made those choices while I remained buckled down at home with my family as weve been much of the year; and frankly also jealous. And trust me (as someone who helped maintain the constituent database) if they can help with it and youre not the unhinged conspiracy spouting person wanting to get the alien spaceship wreckage off their property, theyll want to help, (But also, Im sorry. I agree with RebelwithMouseyHair that today took a detour into personal-relationship advice, rather than just work advice. 1. I think its also possible that LW is reading too deeply into what people say offhand (as we all do from time to time). If you dont fundamentally agree on what life looks like, compromise just means youll like each other but not your life. For example, #2s wife might be excellent at her job, but the boss just happens to keep catching her at the wrong moment, when she is taking a short break between tasks, or grabbing something from her purse, or thinking about how to proceed on a task. Im afraid we are headed for lockdown and those that were lucky to be able to reopen might not be so this time. When I left that job, I considered asking him out but Im glad I didnt. LW2: It could be that the manager is tracking performance issues via a calendar in order to show a timeline of events, but if that were the case I would have expected the manager and wife would have already had a conversation about this. So if thats not clear in the contract and you care about an ongoing relationship with the client, consider checking. It's unclear, but one theory is that our eyes dilate to take in more light, so he's trying to take in more of her beauty. A woman aged in her 40s has been arrested on suspicion of causing death by dangerous driving and remains in custody. LW#5 here! He was a seventeen year old kid working in a retail clothing store. And thats okay! I genuinely dont like Christmas for a number of reasons. Well, are they RIGHT? Also, if Im thinking of the right group, because they buy it up pennies on the dollar, a donation of, say $10 might forgive more like $100 of debt, which is pretty great. If you cant get in touch w/ them, you need to document it. TMZ.com. Pissing about is very British! Also, again, if shes anything like me, she doesnt have her act together, shes just good at pretending like she does. Be yourself (which you are likely still figuring out, as are we all). A place where someone keeps all their work notes, assuming that it will be confidential. Or is that kind of diary more like just a blank notebook with a list of appointments? Frankly, she sounds rather predatory to me. You look forward to seeing them and feel energized, even euphoric, when you spend . Id call that my diary, dont feel we (Brits) use the word journal as much. From the constituent end, my Senators staff has been very helpful when I needed to cut through red tape quickly to get a passport renewed. Lets call him Will Yates. Yep, because oldest child. are taught to fill in the dates their assignments are due in what I would call a datebook or planner and the schools call an agenda. Lack of evidence isnt the same as a solid no, and under normal circumstances, Id say go ahead and ask; sometimes we need a solid answer to move on. IMO we dont have enough information to make a judgement on that, though Im glad that some commentators flagged some of the language in the letter. Thats another reason to bring in help! In the U.S., calendar can hang on the wall or it can be a book you write appointments, etc. I would certainly *hope* she wouldnt consider a romantic relationship in that case. Im not going out there with anyone who I think could potentially have reasons to hit on me while Im in a remote location when I have no idea how they will take rejection! It doesnt make financial sense for him to take time away from his busy caseload of paying clients to give out free advice. Or even if the genders were reversed surely 21-year-olds and 36-year-olds can have interesting conversations. But this started when he was 17 a minor, likely still in high school, and the other party was his manager at the time. Now, if I had a friendship with someone that age, I would see them almost as a child. Its a program that helps people but its not something that needs a public campaign, thats how you get lots of people contacting unemployment about their stimulus checks, or just because they need help. Retail throws all sorts of folks who might otherwise never interact together, there will be times the store is dead and theres nothing work related to talk about, so you talk about other stuff (which might include whatever a 17-21 year old considers deep, intellectual talk). But if it means that LW needs to continue having the same warm relationship with her outside of work, I dont think thats reasonable. While the relationship may not sour, it could be different from how it is now. This is along what the letter raised for me. When I was an intern in a Congressional office, being able to transfer people to our constituent services staff who could actually help was a joynot least because it meant I wasnt getting sworn at for my bosss positions, or expected to listen to long and involved conspiracy theories. If he were ever to express interest in me Id be very worried because thats not how I think of him. Im pregnant and my appetite is super weird, so I didnt even cook myself a nice Christmas meal (protein shakes and easy mac are about all I can handle right now). I also am away from my home city so I dont have any friends in city even if I wanted to get together while socially distancing. /kl.n.dr/ A desk diary is a large diary / appointment book and in a classic crime novel it would probably be bound in leather and fairly weighty. I havent seen my mother who was diagnosed with dementia since January 2020. Check work policy, ask for the date, be prepared to remain warm and respectful regardless of the outcome, and youve got nothing to lose. The American medical system: more money for worse care than anywhere else in the industrialized world. People in my state were getting denial letters after the window had closed and the Unemployment Agency was being a bit more flexible because the delays were their fault, not the fault of the people applying. To be fair, when I ended things with a romantic interest, he said he thought we were great together because we had deep and intellectual conversation. I spent my week between Christmas and New Years mostly cleaning the house, which was great in its own way but hardly the answer anyone wants. Heck, it might even be less relevant if they didnt have a reporting relationship or even worked together. Your friend opens herself up to a LOT of judgment if she decided to date you, which, even if she was attracted to you, might be enough to deter her from accepting. I mean what else is there to say? Did not make them so. Just say you didnt do much. But as someone whose husband is 12 years younger than me, starting out as acquaintances, I can attest that its possible that these two folks could get together and be the real deal. In any case, your wife now has the advantage of knowing what her manager thinks of her, when previously she didnt, and thats useful. Are you wondering whether he feels the same? That said, theres so much more to making a relationship work than maturity level, mutual connection, and good conversation. You, at 21 years old, are literally incapable of accurately gauging whether you are truly mature for your age; you probably lack experience and time to contextualize. Realizing that what the OP welcomes as close friendship / possible flirtatious behavior (the late night walks) might actually be inappropriate behavior on the part of someone who has enough influence and authority to know better should most definitely change the situation and whether they consider acting on their crush or not. If you are truly friends and if you care about her as a human being at all, there is no reason your friendship shouldnt be able to remain the same if youre told no. I would love to opine about how all that matters is love, but its just not true. I kind of agree, but I also think that someone in LW#1s position is going to clutch at whatever straw is out there to justify his feelings. I just give a slightly pass-ag Oh, my break was pretty quiet because Im being pretty serious about social distancing, and move on. Im so sorry to hear that, my sympathies to you and your family. Eww. Im so sorry. Friendships are a choice, not an obligation. Not sure if its any better right now, it seems to be a quagmire for anyone unfortunate enough to have to work with them. Also the question about the relevance of raised eyebrows. Because of my personal night-hike-with-coworkers background, this doesnt feel especially off for me, since its possible these folks have a similar situation. It will reveal 16 clearcut signs that a younger man likes an older woman. My daughter just recently had a huge ER bill, and when I looked into it I discovered the insurance hadnt paid anything because the hospital billed the wrong insurance. Thats nice, but its just an anecdote about one person. Even if the rest of the break sucked, you can usually find one little thing to mention. Definitely. Not saying any of this judgment is correct, but its going to happen within her own peer group. I think it is fair to say that in the US, anything with dates on it is a calendar whether it hangs on the wall, sits flat in a desk blotter, sits in a sort of stand on the desk, is a notebook type thing you carry, or is in your computer, they are all calendars. Something muted along the lines of ok or very quiet under the circumstances or could have been worse is far more common judging from my post Christmas chats with colleagues. Cats, the ultimate coworkers. At 21, you may feel more mature and you may be truly an old soul, but being more formal than your peers isnt actual maturity. I wouldnt go out of my way to read something open on a desk, but if I saw my own name or happened to catch a line or two that seemed questionable as I was passing by, Id definitely stop to see what it is. This gave the minimum age for the younger than would not raise eyebrows. Is there anything wrong with having a crush on an older lady? I - Quora Even if it never gets to court or a hearing, just having someone to guide them through the process can be tremendously helpful. Theres a huge gap in life experience between the early 20s and even the mid-to-late 20s, much less the 30s. Very few people have them now I think because most of us use an online calendar instead. Many hospitals and some physicians will negotiate payment plans or reduce the total amount due if you ask, but thats a daunting thing to do and can retraumatize people who already had a serious illness. But she wasnt his friend, she was his manager. It can also mean a personal journal. My mother was hospitalized due to a recent severe cancer diagnosis over Christmas. A medium age gap?) Seconding the last part of this. If you can similarly find a specific bland one-sentence thing to share that might be a good tactic. If theyre looking for an actual conversation, try to talk about how their Christmas was, most people like talking about themselves more anyways, especially if the had a good time. LW4 I am so sorry to say this, but please be aware that the overpayment might not have gone to you. If a woman had written in about a male manager, I wouldnt assume he was a creep, because I dont see any grooming behavior in the letter just friendly behavior between a manager and their employee. Called my doctor, and turns out my insurance had taken so long to process the claims that they were void, and my doctors office (part of a hospital network) was covering the difference and continued to fight my insurance. Also. Why not unfollow these people? (I dont say this to diminish your accomplishmentjust to emphasize that their reach is huge. Even with all the work our HR did to make sure our unemployment claims were easy, there was a problem with the upload, and I had to make some calls. One of my former 60-something suitors found me in a Kik chat some years later and wanted to catch up, and I was understandably apprehensive. Cats, the ultimate coworkers Its pretty much the opposite of most relationship advice. Maybe it is helpful to the OP. Nonetheless, I havent seen any of my family for over a year now (since last Christmas) and here in the UK the regulations changed at the very last minute, meaning that after looking forward to seeing them for months I was left at home alone with two days notice. Sure, there have been some gossips around them, but no more than for same sex couples. It can definitely work but its also a big, big risk. At 29, I cant imagine dating a 21 year old, but my partner is 40. I was intelligent, and didnt get drunk or high and read a lot of books about philosophy. I was intensely focused on school and my career. *Legal challenges to the complaint (e.g. This kind of thing is very much a use your words scenario. Seems to be working well the dog people sometimes want dog details (which is fine in my case), and no one else asks for additional info. She was married and I didn't have much opportunity to see her. Friendships happen regardless of age. No one here is asking much about holiday plans, because the answers tend to range from forced-cheer Oh, nothing much just a lovely quiet day at home at best to Terrible, someone close to me died/is in the hospital.. I missed seeing my family, but I realized just how much I hate traveling and it was nice to have a break from it. We also take note of how our state legislature hasnt met in session in over 9 months (!) Dating relationships was not one of them. Heck, I was thirty and made a wince face emoji at a friend whose 30-year-old ex husband was dating someone who was 20. All of my coworkers have been travelling throughout the pandemic, so the holidays were no exception. And OP, if you do decide to ask her out, for the love of crme brle, do not do it during one of these night hikes. Im a bit older than his supervisor here, and if one of my 15-year-junior employees indicated an interest in me, Id likely be some mix of mildly flattered, amused, and baffled but mostly creeped out. If so, leaving the book out could have been major carelessness, but it looks pretty sketchy to me. (Im an MD and thus complicit in this mess). At 21, youve still got 4 years before your brain has finished adolescent development. Like the type of person who would scream for a manager if the grocery store clerk told them their coupon had expired or you disagree with their political views and they go on a rant about why you are wrong. Its also possible to stay friends even when there is a mutual attraction by just not acting on it. Its great you have a friend at work that you also see out of work, dont make it weird. Even though you arent in her direct chain of command, she is in a position of power at the company. Karen means someone who acts entitled and demanding, right? I work in an extremely male-dominated environment, I started in the industry before leaving high school. The agency cant offer legal advice, but the staff do most of the work that a plaintiffs attorney would do. a) being composed or having a formal comportment, Sorry for an inadvertent trip down memory lane! It was incredibly frustrating, but I also dont think calling my legislators would have helped. My sister met her husband at work. They can also help you file a complaint. Maybe you are! She says that helped her a lot. What should I tell her? That makes the task a bit easier. Ditto on the men in their fifties emailing me as a thirtysomething. Without more information, I dont know whether or not the older coworker is deliberately making him feel that way or not, but regardless, it doesnt seem like he has the healthiest viewpoint toward this relationship (in the sense of whats best for him). Unless Im missing something, LW has only contacted UI, not his/her states human rights commission. At least based on what LW1 has said, this is way different from the situation with the 18-year-old intern and the 40ish woman. Not go from friends to them potentially (and Im not saying the LW would) suddenly turning into a grabby handsy octopus in a deserted area alone with them at night (but you said you were interested! However, is it indiscreet to use the clients name? There are many people who date younger people for predatory or inappropriate reasons, and the young people dont always have the life experience to identify the warning signs. 1:00. In social situations, sure, if you are not sure just ask. They help with this sort of thing a lot! +1 on this. A better timeline, as hard as it may be to wait, is wait until one of you does not work for the company. No, this makes it worse. I dont think its accurate to describe that as an echo chamber unless its your sole source of news or information about the world, which doesnt seem to be the case at all. Its pretty transparent that asking theoretically, would you be interested in going on a date with me? is a lead-up to ok so will you go on a date with me? It would come across as naive to behave otherwise. Personally I was fortunate to have been able to decamp to my parents house before Lockdown 2.0 in November, so I was able to spend Christmas with my family, but the flip side of that is that I havent been home for 9 weeks, am now looking at a further 6 weeks minimum away from my flat, and the admin side of that is starting to be a headache. I keep a notebook where I write down notes from my employee meetingsBUT I dont put opinions and I certainly dont leave it out, or out and OPEN. Thats pretty much how I saw it. Definitely. Why? Crush on an older woman - What should I do? Digital Spy The gap in life experience between someone who is the age of a senior in college and someone who is a few years from being 40 years old is massive. how can I get better at spotting talent in people different than me? I was overpaid about 3 weeks worth and am being careful not to touch it as I know they will come looking for it eventually. Either way technically its not illegal! is not a convincing excuse for a grown man or woman to date a younger person. Better to explore with the agency rather than just assume its too late. through the diary, Jane read the bosss unvarnished thoughts. Im 53, and inside my head I totally feel like Im about 25. In consulting its a common practice to check with clients before using their name, but many will be happy to allow it. Even if shes not in your direct chain of command anymore, youd be taking a risk by asking her out. Same. LW 2 My first thought was that your wifes boss wanted her to read her comments about you. French teen shooting: Piecing together what happened - BBC News The 20 . Wimbledon school crash: Girl, 8, dies after car crashes into primary So if youd asked me directly about whether you should ask her out Id read you Alisons answer but also add a bit about maybe waiting till this unprecedented catastrophic situation has become more managed and less bad. The very nicest clients will authorise a useful soundbite that you can use on your website/advertising materials. Good luck! then it would be really weird to have that sitting out at work. They hired hundreds of people at the beginning of the crisis and its still overwhelmed. Heck Im 28 and 21 year olds are kids. I thought that was what AAM was suggesting when she recommended consulting with an attorney (in addition to possible UI issues). Ive been back at work (WFH) for a week, and so far I havent talked much about my break. This. They rarely are. Had a boss who only kept a written diary at work, refused to use Outlook to book meetings etc. But that age difference is a big one. a book with a separate space or page for each day, in which you write down your future arrangements, meetings, etc. Combine that with the name jumping out and most such people would have read it. There is a small group of people who seem to love drama and they are the ones doing the things I think are high risk. Is she being flirtatious / sending interested signals / making social overtures herself? If you believe youve been discriminated against on the basis of a disability or perceived disability, I recommend contacting your state agency (state agencies generally process complaints a lot faster than the EEOC). I get why the wording of the letter-writer is a flag, but I also knew a lot of people in college with the same attitude of I am more mature/deep/intellectual than my peers, and often they were conflating academic maturity or just how they came across in conversation with truly being mature across the board (emotionally, in relationships, etc). I eventually went back to that company and were coworkers again. It might seem odd to do this at the start but I would seriously recommend talking to each other about your goals and what you want out of life before you start dating. What they meant was that they were intelligent. I would greatly appreciate any thoughts on my predicament. This is absolutely a case where, if the genders were reversed, the commenters would be up in arms. As a 30s woman, this explanation was the first obvious thing I thought of too. If 21 years old was too young to have a relationship, then majority would be later. us Shes supposed to be working, not reading the bosss diary!

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